Chapter Text
"We visit the Garden Gnome Emporium," Astoria read.
In a way, it's nice to know there are Greek gods out there because you have somebody to blamewhen things go wrong.
Frank laughed. "Yes, that is the best thing about the existence of gods," he said sarcastically.
For instance, when you're walking away from a bus that's just been attacked by monster hags and blown up by lightning, and it's raining on top of everything else, most people might think that's just really bad luck; when you're a half-blood, you understand that some divine force really is trying to mess up your day.
"Usually Hera-slash-Juno," Leo glared.
So there we were, Annabeth, Artemis and Grover and I, walking through the woods along the New Jersey riverbank, the glow of New York City making the night sky yellow behind us, and the smell of the Hudson reeking in our noses.
"Ew," Draco wrinkled his nose.
Grover was shivering and braying, his big goat eyes turned slit-pupiled and full of terror. "ThreeKindly Ones. All three at once."
I was pretty much in shock myself. The explosion of bus windows still rang in my ears. ButAnnabeth kept pulling us along, saying: "Come on! The farther away we get, the better."
"All our money was back there," I reminded her. "Our food and clothes. Everything."
"Not all, Artemis was smart enough to keep stuff on her," Thena corrected.
"Almo-"
"Well, maybe if you hadn't decided to jump into the fight—"
"Seriously!?"
"What did you want me to do? Let you get killed?"
"Yeah Annabe-"
"You didn't need to protect me, Percy. I would've been fine."
"No you wouldn't have," Piper told her.
"Sliced like sandwich bread," Grover put in, "but fine."
"Shut up, goat boy," said Annabeth.
"Oh so he gets to talk," Artemis huffed.
"justice for emi," Leo said.
Grover brayed mournfully. "Tin cans . . . a perfectly good bag of tin cans."
We sloshed across mushy ground, through nasty twisted trees that smelled like sour laundry.
After a few minutes, Annabeth fell into line next to me. "Look, I . . ." Her voice faltered. "Iappreciate your coming back for us, okay? That was really brave."
"Annabeth swallowing her pride, that's a thing you don't see ever," Ajax said.
"We're a team, right?"
She was silent for a few more steps. "It's just that if you died . . . aside from the fact that it wouldreally suck for you, it would mean the quest was over. This may be my only chance to see the real world."
"You haven't left since you were seven?" Ginny frowned.
"It's complicated," Annabeth told her.
The thunderstorm had finally let up. The city glow faded behind us, leaving us in almost totaldarkness. I couldn't see anything of Annabeth except a glint of her blond hair.
"You haven't left Camp Half-Blood since you were seven?" I asked her.
"No . . . only short field trips. My dad—"
"The history professor."
"he remembered."
"Yeah. It didn't work out for me living at home. I mean, Camp Half-Blood is my home." She wasrushing her words out now, as if she were afraid somebody might try to stop her. "At camp you train and train. And that's all cool and everything, but the real world is where the monsters are. That's where you learn whether you're any good or not."
If I didn't know better, I could've sworn I heard doubt in her voice."You're pretty good with that knife," I said.
"You think so?"
"Anybody who can piggyback-ride a Fury is okay by me."
"Awww," Piper teased.
I couldn't really see, but I thought she might've smiled.
"You know," she said, "maybe I should tell you . . . Something funny back on the bus . . ."
Whatever she wanted to say was interrupted by a shrill toot-toot-toot, like the sound of an owl being tortured.
Grover's jaw dropped and Percy hid behind Hazel. "Hazel use your mist magic," he hissed. "Hide me."
"Not a chance," Hazel shook her head.
"Hey, my reed pipes still work!" Grover cried. "If I could just remember a 'find path' song, wecould get out of these woods!"
"What songs do you know?" Luna asked.
"Consensus," Grover said. When the others looked confused, Coach Hedge started playing on his reed pipes, and Grover started the Consensus song.
"Oh, golly, the road’s gettin’ bumpy 'cause I got me some friends
Who just can’t get along
Oh, dear! When the team’s gettin’ grumpy
The trick to gettin’ through it is singin’ this song..."
"What are you doing?" Ajax asked.
"It’s the consensus song. Verse two encourages us to say nice things about each other. You get a few rounds in and you’d be amazed at how disagreements just kind of fade away," Grover shrugged.
He puffed out a few notes, but the tune still sounded suspiciously like Hilary Duff. Instead of finding a path, I immediately slammed into a tree and got a nice-size knot on my head.
The hall burst into laughter.
Add to the list of superpowers I did not have: infrared vision.
Artemis looked between Annabeth and me with a strange smile on her face. I was confused as to why.
"Are you sure you're not a blonde?" Piper asked.
"What?" Percy frowned.
After tripping and cursing and generally feeling miserable for another mile or so, I started to seelight up ahead: the colors of a neon sign. I could smell food. Fried, greasy, excellent food. I realized I hadn't eaten anything unhealthy since I'd arrived at Half-Blood Hill, where we lived on grapes, bread, cheese, and extra-lean-cut nymph-prepared barbecue. This boy needed a double cheeseburger.
Piper and Artemis looked disgusted.
"You've insulted the vegetarians - good job Percy," Leo shook his head.
We kept walking until I saw a deserted two-lane road through the trees. On the other side was aclosed-down gas station, a tattered billboard for a 1990s movie, and one open business, which was the source of the neon light and the good smell.
It wasn't a fast-food restaurant like I'd hoped. It was one of those weird roadside curio shops that sell lawn flamingos and wooden Indians and cement grizzly bears and stuff like that. The main building was a long, low warehouse, surrounded by acres of statuary. The neon sign above the gate was impossible for me to read, because if there's anything worse for my dyslexia than regular English, it's red cursive neon English.
To me, it looked like: ATNYU MES GDERAN GOMEN MEPROUIM.
"Is that what dyslexia is like?" Hermione asked.
"Pretty much, yeah," Draco nodded. Hermione, Harry and Ron were surprised at the lack of insult.
"What the heck does that say?" I asked.
"I don't know," Annabeth said. She loved reading so much, I'd forgotten she was dyslexic, too.
Grover translated: "Aunty Em's Garden Gnome Emporium."
Flanking the entrance, as advertised, were two cement garden gnomes, ugly bearded little runts,smiling and waving, as if they were about to get their picture taken.
"Oh no," Artemis's eyes widened.
"What?" George asked.
"Aunty "Em" has a garden full of petrified stone folks," Artemis explained, and the other demigods sucked in a breath.
I crossed the street, following the smell of the hamburgers."Hey . . ." Grover warned.
"The lights are on inside," Annabeth said. "Maybe it's open."
"Snack bar," I said wistfully.
"Snack bar," she agreed.
"The Dam Snack Bar," Thalia said, and Thalia, Grover and Percy dissolved into giggles.
"Are you two crazy?" Grover said. "This place is weird."
Artemis looked from Grover to the gate, biting her lip nervously. "I think you two should listen to Grover."
"Why weren't you affected?" Ginny asked.
"I'm a daughter of the goddess who's whole thing is enchantment. You develop a sort of immunity," Artemis told her.
We ignored them.The front lot was a forest of statues: cement animals, cement children, even a cement satyr playing the pipes, which gave Grover the creeps."Bla-ha-ha!" he bleated. "Looks like my Uncle Ferdinand!"
Grover looked upset.
We stopped at the warehouse door."Don't knock," Grover pleaded. "I smell monsters."
"Your nose is clogged up from the Furies," Annabeth told him. "All I smell is burgers. Aren't youhungry?"
Annabeth winced. "Sorry Grover."
"Annabeth, you know I'm a vegetarian, and that's not the point," Artemis tried. "Try and think!"
"I am thinking. About meat," Annabeth looked like she was about to drool
"Meat!" Grover said scornfully. "I'm a vegetarian."
"You eat cheese enchiladas and aluminum cans," I reminded him.
"Those are vegetables."
"Obviously," Fred confirmed.
"Come on. Let's leave. These statues are . . . looking at me."
"Like paintings," Hazel shuddered.
Then the door creaked open, and standing in front of us was a tall Middle Eastern woman—at least, I assumed she was Middle Eastern, because she wore a long black gown that covered everything but her hands, and her head was completely veiled. Her eyes glinted behind a curtain of black gauze, but that was about all I could make out. Her coffee-colored hands looked old, but well-manicured and elegant, so I imagined she was a grandmother who had once been a beautiful lady.
Her accent sounded vaguely Middle Eastern, too. She said, "Children, it is too late to be out allalone. Where are your parents?"
"They're . . . um . . ." Annabeth started to say.
"We're orphans," I said.
"Did Percy just come up with a good lie?" Piper frowned.
"Wait for it," Annabeth held up a hand.
"Orphans?" the woman said. The word sounded alien in her mouth. "But, my dears! Surely not!"
"We got separated from our caravan," I said. "Our circus caravan. The ringmaster told us to meethim at the gas station if we got lost, but he may have forgotten, or maybe he meant a different gas station."
"And there it is," Piper sighed. "f*cking gods Percy!"
"Hey - Leo's the one dating a goddess, not me!" Percy held up his hands.
"Percy oh my f-" Annabeth screamed into her hands.
"Anyway, we're lost. Is that food I smell?"
"Oh, my dears," the woman said. "You must come in, poor children. I am Aunty Em. Go straightthrough to the back of the warehouse, please. There is a dining area."
Artemis looked nervously around, and seemed reluctant to come inside, but Annabeth dragged her in after thanking Aunty Em. "Circus caravan?" Annabeth muttered to me.
"Always have a strategy, right?"
"That's not strategy," Frank shook his head.
"Your head is full of kelp."
Thalia nodded. "Thank you!"
The warehouse was filled with more statues—people in all different poses, wearing all differentoutfits and with different expressions on their faces. I was thinking you'd have to have a pretty huge garden to fit even one of these statues, because they were all life-size.
"Ohh!" Hermione covered her mouth. "She's -"
"What have we said about spoilers?" Annabeth interrupted.
But mostly, I was thinking about food.Go ahead, call me an idiot for walking into a strange lady's shop like that just because I was hungry, but I do impulsive stuff sometimes. Plus, you've never smelled Aunty Em's burgers. The aroma was like laughing gas in the dentist's chair—it made everything else go away.
I barely noticed Grover's nervous whimpers, or the way the statues' eyes seemed to follow me, or the fact that Aunty Em had locked the door behind us.
"How did you notice that?" Leo asked. "You're spelled!"
"It's Percy," Frank reminded him.
All I cared about was finding the dining area. And sure enough, there it was at the back of thewarehouse, a fast-food counter with a grill, a soda fountain, a pretzel heater, and a nacho cheesedispenser. Everything you could want, plus a few steel picnic tables out front.
"Please, sit down," Aunty Em said.
"Awesome," I said.
"Um," Grover said reluctantly, "we don't have any money, ma'am."
Before I could jab him in the ribs, Aunty Em said, "No, no, children. No money. This is a specialcase, yes? It is my treat, for such nice orphans."
"That's not concerning to you?" Clarisse asked.
"Thank you, ma'am," Annabeth said.
Aunty Em stiffened, as if Annabeth had done something wrong, but then the old woman relaxed just as quickly, so I figured it must've been my imagination.
"Just like Mrs Dodds was?" Clarisse teased.
"Quite all right, Annabeth," she said. "You have such beautiful gray eyes, child." Only later did Iwonder how she knew Annabeth's name, even though we had never introduced ourselves.
Our hostess disappeared behind the snack counter and started cooking. Before we knew it, she'd brought us plastic trays heaped with double cheeseburgers, vanilla shakes, and XXL servings of French fries.
I was halfway through my burger before I remembered to breathe. Annabeth slurped her shake. Grover picked at the fries, and eyed the tray's waxed paper liner as if he might go for that, but hestill looked too nervous to eat. Artemis didn't touch the food, tapping her foot nervously, and thrumming the hair tie on her wrist against her skin.
"You really should've listened to the satyr that can smell monsters and the girl who can't be enchanted and can see through the mist," Draco said.
"What's that hissing noise?" Grover asked. I listened, but didn't hear anything. Annabeth shook her head. Artemis didn't look up, squeezing her eyes shut and mouthing indistinguishable words.
"Hissing?" Aunty Em asked. "Perhaps you hear the deep-fryer oil. You have keen ears, Grover."
"Really? I wonder why," Ajax said flatly.
"I take vitamins. For my ears."
"See - that's a lie. That's how you lie, Percy," Thalia said pointedly.
"That's admirable," she said. "But please, relax."
Aunty Em ate nothing. She hadn't taken off her headdress, even to cook, and now she sat forward and interlaced her fingers and watched us eat. It was a little unsettling, having someone stare at me when I couldn't see her face, but I was feeling satisfied after the burger, and a little sleepy, and I figured the least I could do was try to make small talk with our hostess.
"How kind of you," Annabeth said sourly.
"So, you sell gnomes," I said, trying to sound interested.
"Oh, yes," Aunty Em said. "And animals. And people. Anything for the garden. Custom orders.Statuary is very popular, you know."
"Oh I know," Percy smirked. "So does my stepfather Smelly Gabe."
"A lot of business on this road?"
"Not so much, no. Since the highway was built . . . most cars, they do not go this way now. I mustcherish every customer I get."
"You really show your kindness," Ginny said bluntly.
My neck tingled, as if somebody else was looking at me. I turned, but it was just a statue of a young girl holding an Easter basket. The detail was incredible, much better than you see in most garden statues. But something was wrong with her face. It looked as if she were startled, or even terrified.
"I wonder why. That wasn't concerning for you?" Clarisse said sarcastically.
"I was twelve!" Percy defended.
"And you fought my father!" Clarisse argued back.
"Ah," Aunty Em said sadly. "You notice some of my creations do not turn out well. They aremarred. They do not sell. The face is the hardest to get right. Always the face."
"You make these statues yourself ?" I asked.
"Oh, yes. Once upon a time, I had two sisters to help me in the business, but they have passed on, and Aunty Em is alone. I have only my statues. This is why I make them, you see. They are mycompany." The sadness in her voice sounded so deep and so real that I couldn't help feeling sorry for her.
"Ohh," a group of Ravenclaws figured it out.
"What?" Ron asked.
"You'll see," Hermione told him. "No spoilers."
Annabeth had stopped eating. She sat forward and said, "Two sisters?"Artemis stopped fiddling with the hair tie and opened her eyes, exchanging a look with Annabeth.
"It's aboutdamtime the brains of the operation started working," Thalia said.
"It's a terrible story," Aunty Em said. "Not one for children, really. You see, Annabeth, a badwoman was jealous of me, long ago, when I was young. I had a . . . a boyfriend, you know, and this bad woman was determined to break us apart. She caused a terrible accident. My sisters stayed by me. They shared my bad fortune as long as they could, but eventually they passed on. They faded away. I alone have survived, but at a price. Such a price."
"That isn't what happened," Thena rolled her eyes.
I wasn't sure what she meant, but I felt bad for her. My eyelids kept getting heavier, my full stomach making me sleepy. Poor old lady. Who would want to hurt somebody so nice?
"Nice?" Draco scoffed.
"Percy?" Annabeth was shaking me to get my attention."Maybe we should go. I mean, the ringmaster will be waiting."
She sounded tense. I wasn't sure why.
"Maybe because we were about to become statues?" Artemis suggested.
Percy felt horrible for almost getting his friends killed. If only he had been able to throw off Medusa’s enchantment. Maybe they wouldn’t have gotten in the situation they had been in.
Grover was eating the waxed paper off the tray now, but ifAunty Em found that strange, she didn't say anything.
"Such beautiful gray eyes," Aunty Em told Annabeth again. "My, yes, it has been a long time sinceI've seen gray eyes like those."
She reached out as if to stroke Annabeth's cheek, but Annabeth stood up abruptly. "We really should go."
"Yes!" Grover swallowed his waxed paper and stood up. "The ringmaster is waiting! Right!"
I didn't want to leave. I felt full and content. Aunty Em was so nice. I wanted to stay with her awhile.
"That's one strong spell," Hermione noted.
"She probably figured Annabeth knew and was directing it all towards Percy," Artemis told her.
"Please, dears," Aunty Em pleaded. "I so rarely get to be with children. Before you go, won't you at least sit for a pose?"
"A pose?" Annabeth asked warily.
"A photograph. I will use it to model a new statue set. Children are so popular, you see. Everyoneloves children."
"Oh that is so wrong," Fred shuddered, having figured it out.
Annabeth shifted her weight from foot to foot. "I don't think we can, ma'am. Come on, Percy—"
"Sure we can," I said. I was irritated with Annabeth for being so bossy, so rude to an old lady who'd just fed us for free. "It's just a photo, Annabeth. What's the harm?"
"It's just a photo Annabeth. What's the harm," Annabeth mocked, smacking her boyfriend. "Idiot."
"Yes, Annabeth," the woman purred. "No harm."
I could tell Annabeth didn't like it, but she allowed Aunty Em to lead us back out the front door,into the garden of statues.
"I don't think we should, Percy, what about the circus. They're relying on us,remember?" Artemis hissed, her fingers sparkling with magic.
"What were you doing?" Astoria looked up to ask.
"I was trying to remove the enchantment," Artemis told her. "I figured out how to do it a few years ago thanks to Rey, but not back then."
Aunty Em directed us to a park bench next to the stone satyr. "Now," she said, "I'll just position you correctly. The young girls in the middle, I think, and the two young gentlemen on either side."
Artemis didn't move. "I'm sorry Miss, but I can't - "
"Not much light for a photo," I remarked, interrupting Artemis's sentence.
"I was just about to get us out of this situation, come on Perce," Artemis shook her head.
"Oh, enough," Aunty Em said. "Enough for us to see each other, yes?"
"Where's your camera?" Grover asked.
"Come on Groves, you knew who she was!" Thalia urged.
Aunty Em stepped back, as if to admire the shot. "Now, the face is the most difficult. Can you smile for me please, everyone? A large smile?"
Grover glanced at the cement satyr next to him, and mumbled, "That sure does look like UncleFerdinand."
Grover looked sad at the mention of his frozen uncle.
"Grover," Aunty Em chastised, "look this way, dear."She still had no camera in her hands.
"Percy—" Annabeth said.
Some instinct warned me to listen to Annabeth, but I was fighting the sleepy feeling, thecomfortable lull that came from the food and the old lady's voice.
"That's when you learned to always listen to me?" Annabeth said.
"I listened to you about the sirens," Percy shot back.
"I will just be a moment," Aunty Em said. "You know, I can't see you very well in this cursed veil. .. ."
"Percy, something's wrong," Annabeth insisted.
"Wrong?" Aunty Em said, reaching up to undo the wrap around her head. "Not at all, dear. I havesuch noble company tonight. What could be wrong?"
"Oh no," Dean whispered, having figured out who she was.
"That is Uncle Ferdinand!" Grover gasped.
"Poor Grover," Parvati whispered.
"Look away from her!" Annabeth shouted. She whipped her Yankees cap onto her head andvanished. Her invisible hands pushed Grover and me both off the bench.
I was on the ground, looking at Aunt Em's sandaled feet. I could hear Artemis and Grover scrambling off in one direction, Annabeth in another. But I was too dazed to move.
"She must have really been pouring the spell for you to react like this," Jason said.
"It took him quite a bit to snap out of it," Annabeth agreed.
Then I heard a strange, rasping sound above me. My eyes rose to Aunty Em's hands, which hadturned gnarled and warty, with sharp bronze talons for fingernails.
"Eww," Lavender recoiled.
I almost looked higher, but somewhere off to my left Annabeth screamed, "No! Don't!"
More rasping—the sound of tiny snakes, right above me, from . . . from about where Aunty Em'shead would be.
"Ohhhh," Justin figured it out, a horrified look on his face.
"Run!" Grover bleated. I heard him racing across the gravel.
"Maia!" Artemis shouted, kick-starting her sneakers
I couldn't move. I stared at Aunty Em's gnarled claws, and tried to fight the groggy trance the oldwoman had put me in.
"Couldn't you hypothetically remove her curse?" Piper asked Artemis, who shrugged. "We might need the do-it-yourself statue kit again."
"Such a pity to destroy a handsome young face," she told me soothingly. "Stay with me, Percy. All you have to do is look up."
I fought the urge to obey. Instead I looked to one side and saw one of those glass spheres people put in gardens— a gazing ball. I could see Aunty Em's dark reflection in the orange glass; her headdress was gone, revealing her face as a shimmering pale circle. Her hair was moving, writhing like serpents.
Astoria shuddered before continuing.
Aunty Em. Aunty "M."
How could I have been so stupid? Think, I told myself. How did Medusa die in the myth?
"Who's Medusa?" Ron asked.
"She can turn people to stone through eye contact," Hermione said.
But I couldn't think. Something told me that in the myth Medusa had been asleep whenshe wasattacked by my namesake, Perseus. She wasn't anywhere near asleep now. If she wanted, she could take those talons right now and rake open my face.
"Has Percy just fought every monster in Greek mythology?" Leo asked.
Percy laughed. "I would tell you how Zoe died, but Jason would feel inferior and also spoilers."
"Oh now I'm curious. Damn you Percy!" Leo groaned.
"The Gray-Eyed One did this to me, Percy," Medusa said, and she didn't sound anything like amonster. Her voice invited me to look up, to sympathize with a poor old grandmother. "Annabeth's mother, the cursed Athena, turned me from a beautiful woman into this."
"Stupid enchantment."
"Don't listen to her!" Annabeth's voice shouted, somewhere in the statuary. "Run, Percy!"
"Silence!" Medusa snarled. Then her voice modulated back to a comforting purr. "You see why Imust destroy the girl, Percy. She is my enemy's daughter. I shall crush her statue to dust. But you, dear Percy, you need not suffer."
"No," I muttered. I tried to make my legs move.
"Do you really want to help the gods?" Medusa asked. "Do you understand what awaits you on this foolish quest, Percy? What will happen if you reach the Underworld? Do not be a pawn of the Olympians, my dear. You would be better off as a statue. Less pain. Less pain."
"Why did you tell him about being a pawn?" Annabeth groaned. "You encouraged him to do that!"
"Percy!" Behind me, I heard a buzzing sound, like a two-hundred-pound hummingbird in anosedive. Artemis yelled, "Duck!"
I turned, and there she was in the night sky, flying in from twelve o'clock with her winged shoesfluttering, Artemis, holding a tree branch the size of a baseball bat. Her eyes were shut tight, and she was tied back-to-back with Grover, who was navigating by ears and nose alone.
"That's smart," Michael Corner nodded.
"Duck!" Grover yelled.I dove to one side.
Thwack!
Medusa roared with rage. "You miserable demigod," she snarled. "I'll add you to my collection!"
"That was for Uncle Ferdinand!" Grover yelled back.
"Yeah! Go Grovmis!" Leo applauded.
I scrambled away and hid in the statuary while Grover-Artemis swooped down for another pass.
Ker-whack!
"Arrgh!" Medusa yelled, her snake-hair hissing and spitting.
Right next to me, Annabeth's voice said, "Percy!"
"I hate it when you do that," Percy shook his head.
I jumped so high my feet nearly cleared a garden gnome. "Jeez! Don't do that!"
Annabeth took off her Yankees cap and became visible. "You have to cut her head off."
"What? Are you crazy? Let's get out of here."
"Annabeth is logical, Percy's the crazy one," Frank said.
"Medusa is a menace. She's evil. I'd kill her myself, but . . ." Annabeth swallowed, as if she wereabout to make a difficult admission. "But you've got the better weapon. Besides, I'd never get close to her. She'd slice me to bits because of my mother. You—you've got a chance."
"What? I can't—"
"Annabeth just admitted someone was better - come on Prissy!" Clarisse shouted.
"Look, do you want her turning more innocent people into statues?"She pointed to a pair of statue lovers, a man and a woman with their arms around each other, turned to stone by the monster.
"Guilt trip," Ginny respectfully nodded.
Annabeth grabbed a green gazing ball from a nearby pedestal. "A polished shield would be better." She studied the sphere critically. "The convexity will cause some distortion. The reflection's size should be off by a factor of—"
"What?"
"Would you speak English?"
"I am!" She tossed me the glass ball.
"No you're not," Percy disagreed.
"What do you mean? I understood everything," Hermione said.
"You can't speak English either," Ron told her.
"Just look at her in the glass. Never look at her directly."
"Well I was just going to go have a staring contest," Percy said sarcastically.
"Hey, guys!" Grover yelled from somewhere above. "I think she's unconscious!"
"Doubt it."
"Roooaaarrr!"
"Knew it."
"Maybe not," Grover corrected. Him and Artemis went in for another pass with the tree branch.
"Hurry," Annabeth told me. "Grover and Artemis will eventually crash."
"Loving your faith in us," Grover said.
I took out my pen and uncapped it. The bronze blade of Riptide elongated in my hand. I followed the hissing and spitting sounds of Medusa's hair. I kept my eyes locked on the gazing ball so I would only glimpse Medusa's reflection, not the real thing. Then, in the green tinted glass, I saw her.
Artemis was coming in for another turn at bat, but this time she flew a little too low. Medusa grabbed the stick and pulled them off course. The two tumbled through the air and crashed into the arms of a stone grizzly bear with a painful "Ummphh!"
"Ooh," the hall winced.
Medusa was about to lunge at Artemis and Grover when I yelled, "Hey!"
I advanced on her, which wasn't easy, holding a sword and a glass ball. If she charged, I'd have ahard time defending myself. But she let me approach—twenty feet, ten feet.
I could see the reflection of her face now. Surely it wasn't really that ugly. The green swirls of thegazing ball must be distorting it, making it look worse.
"Nope," Annabeth said. "She's really that ugly.
"You wouldn't harm an old woman, Percy," she crooned. "I know you wouldn't."
I hesitated, fascinated by the face I saw reflected in the glass—the eyes that seemed to burn straight through the green tint, making my arms go weak.
From the cement grizzly, Grovermoaned, "Percy, don't listen to her!"
Medusa cackled. "Too late." She lunged at me with her talons.
Everyone was hooked, looking super concerned despite the fact Percy was right there perfectly fine.
I slashed up with my sword, heard a sickening shlock!, then a hiss like wind rushing out of a cavern —the sound of a monster disintegrating.
"Cool," Fred said. "We need -"
"-to get ourselves -"
"-some of those - "
"-handy swords."
Something fell to the ground next to my foot. It took all my willpower not to look. I could feel warm ooze soaking into my sock, little dying snake heads tugging at my shoelaces.
"Ugh," a few of the students were repulsed.
"Oh, yuck," Grover said. His eyes were still tightly closed, but I guess he could hear the thinggurgling and steaming. "Mega-yuck."
Annabeth came up next to me, her eyes fixed on the sky. She was holding Medusa's black veil. She said, "Don't move."
Very, very carefully, without looking down, she knelt and draped the monster's head in black cloth, then picked it up. It was still dripping green juice.
Piper gaged. "That's disgusting."
"Are you okay?" she asked me, her voice trembling.
"Yeah," I decided, though I felt like throwing up my double cheeseburger. "Why didn't . . . whydidn't the head evaporate?"
"Once you sever it, it becomes a spoil of war," she said. "Same as your minotaur horn. But don'tunwrap the head. It can still petrify you."
Hermione's eyes widened. "Do-it-yourself statue kit - are you kidding!?" she gaped.
Grover moaned as he climbed down from the grizzly statue. He had a big welt on his forehead. His green rasta cap hung from one of his little goat horns, and his fake feet had been knocked off his hooves.
"The Red Baron," I said. "Good job."
"What?" Hazel frowned.
"Oh we really need to catch you up. You, Reyna, Artemis, Thalia, Jason, Nico, pretty much everyone is behind," Annabeth said
He managed a bashful grin. "That really was not fun, though. Well, teaming up and hitting-her-with-a-stick part, that was fun. But crashing into a concrete bear? Not fun."
"I thought it was a blast," Artemis shrugged.
"You don't remember the pain," Grover told her.
I recapped my sword. Together, the four of us stumbled back to the warehouse.
We found some old plastic grocery bags behind the snack counter and double-wrapped Medusa's head. We plopped it on the table where we'd eaten dinner and sat around it, too exhausted to speak.
Finally I said, "So we have Athena to thank for this monster?"
"Ugh Percy," Ajax groaned. "You never learn."
Annabeth flashed me an irritated look. "Your dad, actually. Don't you remember? Medusa wasPoseidon's girlfriend. They decided to meet in my mother's temple. That's why Athena turned her into a monster. Medusa and her two sisters who had helped her get into the temple, they became the three gorgons. That's why Medusa wanted to slice me up, but she wanted to preserve you as a nice statue. She's still sweet on your dad. You probably reminded her of him."
"Eww, incest," Pansy said.
"Like you can talk Parkinson," another Slytherin scoffed.
My face was burning. "Oh, so now it's my fault we met Medusa."
Annabeth straightened. In a bad imitation of my voice, she said: "'It's just a photo, Annabeth.What's the harm?'"
Leo laughed at Percy's lecture. "Go Annabeth!"
"Forget it," I said. "You're impossible."
"You're insufferable."
"You're—"
"Hey!" Grover interrupted. "You two are giving me a migraine, and satyrs don't even get migraines.What are we going to do with the head?"
"Good job Groves, get us back on track," Artemis nodded.
I stared at the thing. One little snake was hanging out of a hole in the plastic. The words printed onthe side of the bag said: WE APPRECIATE YOUR BUSINESS!
I was angry, not just with Annabeth or her mom, but with all the gods for this whole quest, forgetting us blown off the road and in two major fights the very first day out from camp. At this rate, we'd never make it to L.A. alive, much less before the summer solstice.
"Yeah, screw the gods," Leo agreed.
What had Medusa said?Do not be a pawn of the Olympians, my dear. You would be better off as a statue.
"Oh no," Artemis laughed. "He's gonna do something."
I got up. "I'll be back."
"Percy," Annabeth called after me. "What are you—"
I searched the back of the warehouse until I found Medusa's office. Her account book showed her six most recent sales, all shipments to the Underworld to decorate Hades and Persephone's garden.
"Oh no," Piper figured it out.
According to one freight bill, the Underworld's billing address was DOA Recording Studios, WestHollywood, California. I folded up the bill and stuffed it in my pocket.
"Good, using your sense," Reyna approved.
In the cash register I found twenty dollars, a few golden drachmas, and some packing slips forHermes Overnight Express, each with a little leather bag attached for coins. I rummaged around the rest of the office until I found the right-size box.
Clarisse gasped, having figured out his plan. "My respect for you just doubled," she said. "And that's saying a lot considering it's very little."
I went back to the picnic table, packed up Medusa's head, and filled out a delivery slip:
The Gods
Mount Olympus
600th Floor,
Empire State Building
New York, NY
With best wishes,
PERCY JACKSON
The hall gaped. "Oh my gods Percy! I love you," Leo laughed.
"Percy, you can’t ship Medusa’s head to Olympus!" Artemis was struggling not laughing.
"Why not?" Percy asked.
"Because the gods won’t like it. At all. "At all" at all," Annabeth told him.
"Why? That’s what you do with dangerous stuff. Like batteries, you just send 'em back where they came from," Percy figured.
"That's not a freaking battery!" Artemis exclaimed. Leo and Ajax were cracking up beside her.
"That's Medusa's head, not a freaking battery!" Artemis exclaimed."Okay. Look, this is a bad idea."
"They're not going to like this," Grover warned. "They'll think you're impertinent."
I poured some golden drachmas in the pouch. As soon as I closed it, there was a sound like a cash register. The package floated off the table and disappeared with a pop!
"I am impertinent," I said.
"Yes you are," Draco nodded.
I looked at Annabeth, daring her to criticize. She didn't. She seemed resigned to the fact that I had a major talent for ticking off the gods.
"I pretty much gave up internally after that," Annabeth agreed.
"Come on," she muttered. "We need a new plan."
"Okay, who wants to read next?" Astoria asked.
"I will," Ginny took the book off her. "We get advice from a poodle."
"Very funny Ginny," Ron told her.
"I'm not kidding," Ginny said.
